What is love or types of love

To begin with, of course, need to understand, but what is love. Until now, scientists do not know which organ in the human body responsible for the emergence of this feeling. Some of them believe that love - a kind of mental disorder. Others say that the ability to love - a special gift, talent. And he was not given to everyone.
And there is an interesting point: the person may experience a feeling of not more than three times over a lifetime. But love - plenty. What's the difference? Love - a bright, passionate feeling, but it lasts no more than three weeks. But then either evaporates, though nothing had happened, or transfer of ownership in love. Then about 7 - 9 months lasting phase of passionate love. This period, say the psychologists, accompanied by autonomic disorders, sleep disorders, but three times increase in the number of immune bodies in the blood, so in love rarely get sick, they easily cured neuroses, phobias, scars and sores, even temporarily, is a mild form of diabetes.
Then comes a crisis, when the lovers begin to quarrel violently sort things out. And if they are still happily bypassed this period, the phase of "love-passion" goes into "love-friendship". This is a relatively quiet period, which can last up to three years until the next crisis comes.

If you are in love, and through him, the next stage - the "love-intimacy, which is dominated by tenderness and care. And it can last until the end of life.

And now - promises brighter scenario more sense.

Eyes on the parents!

This is one of the most common scenarios. The people have long noticed that the girls marry guys in many ways similar to their (girls) their fathers. And guys choose the girl, reminiscent of his mother. It's simple: a child's mother and father are for the child samples, respectively, women and men. And when children grow up, it triggered effect from prison to a certain type of appearance and character.

The trap lies in the fact that a man falls in love is not an exact copy of its parent, but only like him as a one. Proved that we remember the bad much longer. And sometimes it turns out this paradox: the love of man does not arise for his dignity, and for shortcomings.

The relationship of family scenario is constantly evolving with caution: "But as it was the parents?" Such an alliance could be a long and harmonious, if: 1) both were full of loving and harmonious family, 2) their parents are somewhat similar to each other.

Example: the couple Catherine and Alexander Strizhenova, whose families were from the same social environment (people in the arts), and both went in the footsteps of parents, thus trying to replicate their way of life.

If these two points do not match, then the relationship lasts from three months to a year.

By the way, if a child is raised in an incomplete family, and he has not formed an idea of what a family, then it will be difficult to build long-term relationships: no one to learn from experience, as it will have to learn this from scratch.

Adrenal passion

The relationship of this scenario is similar to riding a roller coaster. They start abruptly, with a glance. However, it is preceded by one important point: before the fateful meeting in the blood should also be dramatically adrenaline rush. Reason - sports load, fear, an impressive film. And then there are strong feelings at the expense of one-two. So girls everywhere fall in love with the heroes, saving them from bullies, and athletes after training - into the first beauties. Incidentally, in this scenario, the most important role played by physical attractiveness. Biologically, we strive to continue the species with the most attractive special plus again a stereotype drawn from the movie: beautiful = good.

At adrenalin scenario does not apply the rule of crisis. It has its cycles. The first phase - mutual interest and careful study of each other, accompanied by passion. When the senses begin to fade, one of the pair tries to recover ... with adrenaline. So subconsciously begins to act so as to cause a splash of hormones in the blood. And the easiest way - a quarrel. After that - rough sex. And a brief respite. Most adrenal relationship lasts from six months to two years maximum. Although both men later recall with nostalgia that "passionate" and sometimes even go to a meeting, trying to repeat what happened. But the return is nothing is impossible, since in principle, and return there was nothing. Such relations were Alexander Domogarova with Natalia Gromushkinoy.

I like you instead of the Pope

It is preferred partner is much older - at 15 - 30 years, which is more common in women. Moreover, this phenomenon has three quite different reasons:

You were late child and childhood have seen in the role of parents is very mature people. This case, in essence, is your family scenario.

Either the family was incomplete or missing child more attention to the parent of the opposite sex. Women in this case are attracted to men older than themselves, and men are looking for a woman stronger and wiser than themselves.

In the adult man says hurt the child, who was dissatisfied with his father or mother, and now subconsciously chooses the man who would be his taste.

In these respects, the senior or more powerful by nature always plays a role in half of the father or mother. It, in turn, can talk vospitatelsky unrealized potential. Then such a relationship lasts long enough. Psychoanalysts would argue that it is one of the most stable scenario of family life. But there are pitfalls: once the child grows out of "baby" of psychology and starts looking for his equal partner, as happened in the family of singer Jasmine. A positive example of this scenario - the family Oleg Tabakov and Marina Zudin.

Second half

This is a rare way to build relationships, but the most reliable. And essentially passive. When we are actively looking for a pair, then act in a certain sense, as buyers in the market. And in this scenario, the partner himself finds us. Second half - is someone who matches you on the character, temperament, is close to you on work, to life. Yes, it's the conventional wisdom. It's easier to believe in a beautiful fairy tale about the fact that opposites attract. But according to psychologists, or one pair of prevailing on the principle of opposites, not overcome the barrier and three relations. Judge for yourself, as you may understand each other's quiet and introverted, homebody ekstravertka, loving, boisterous company. Get on people who in many respects similar, and even in something complementary. Then they become a single organism, which is easily going through crises of love and becomes the standard relations for the children and grandchildren.

Many people hard to find your other half, only for one reason: they know themselves well enough. See happiness can only person mentally mature, harmonious, to understand himself. For only by knowing yourself, you can see reflected in the other person.

These relationships can be found on honesty, trust and absolute psychological proximity to people. A vivid illustration of this type of relationship are a pair, formed from the old guard of actors: Gaft - Ostroumova, Karachentsov - Porgina.

Prince and Princess

Here people are trying to build relationships, as a rule, after one unsuccessful attempt, traumatic experiences. That was when the debate begins over on "The man must have", "a woman should be" ... In the course of going all the stereotypes about the so-called "real" man / woman and images from the movies.

Problems of this scenario lie on the surface, as in dreams connected unconnected.

Men want a woman with three higher education, but at the same time wise enough to look a little foolish himself, who can cook fantastic, relaxed in bed, but it is desirable to keep for him innocent, successful and thesis writing, and cans of tomatoes spinning.

The women get no less than fantastic image: athletic, attentive, romantic, with the ability to earn a lot and understand a woman with half a word, to sing, dance, know what's hot, but not be metrosexuals, and be able to hammer a nail, make a bed and parquet polpinka prove the theorem of Poincare.

Search stereotypical partner - not an easy exercise. And really what percentage of defective imitations! In the end, can be found some alternative, but it certainly needs some work. For this reason, relations with programmed partner, as a rule, do not pass through a "crisis of one year." Unless you suddenly realize that life is not to be invented, but with a real person.

By the way, the constant search for the ideal partner is typical for people gifted. But in their case, this process looks a little different: they create an image of a loved one, as a separate piece of art, and then only look for his real incarnation, to see him live. And if you are suddenly, the first time experiencing an acute sense of love. Yet come up with some other ideal. An example embodiment of this scenario may be a chain of romances and marriages composer Maxim Dunaevskogo.

RAPID TEST

Your Union is strong, if:

... you to enjoy together. Do you have a "personal bank" co-invented jokes that only you understand, and he constantly replenished;

... even if sex and rare, still a regular and memorable;

... you are on one level, discussing household affairs. Instead of choosing the color of curtains, wallpaper, and picture a place where there should be a bed. And both are involved in general cleaning;

... you are interested in work and training each other. You are sharing news and gossip about coworkers, even if you do not know;

... you regularly speak to each other that happy, and this is true.